I’ve been watching a bunch of short films on Issa Rae’s Youtube channel (amazing)! One that stood out to me was titled A Different Tree. It featured a black girl who has been abandoned by her dad. She feels sad about being fatherless and this is something that I and many other black kids had to deal with, “the absent father”. I’m sure this happens in other races as well, but it’s practically a blessing hearing that a black kid grew up with both his/her parents. You almost never hear this problem from a white family.
Well, my father was deadbeat nonetheless. It really hasn’t impacted me that much until I found myself wishing to have a perfect family. I catch myself glamorizing celebrities for posting their family pics. It gets to a point where sometimes I wish I was a part of their families. It’s interesting how when we think of the American Dream, we think of having well paying jobs, a huge house, a partner, and your kids by your side. Yet, how often do blacks obtain this dream? How often is it presented in the media without the negative stereotypes? I always saw the American Dream as something so whitewashed and restricted to white people.
Honestly, this mentality has led me to wish that sometimes I were white (not necessarily in terms of looks, but in terms of convinience). I would get jobs much easier, I would have a much more stable family (mentally and financially), and my love life would be much better. Life would just be easier overall and frankly the media does a great job portraying the ease of being white. Whether its sitcoms, magazine covers, or even social media, there is still a lack of representation of diversity. And if there is diversity, it’s mainly under a negative light with a cheating scandal involved.
Walking around NYU doesn’t really help either. I see black nannies taking care of white kids all the time. It makes me feel uneasy. It’s like there is still a racial power struggle where black people are always financially below. I never see it the other way around, white nannies taking care of black kids especially in a middle-class area.
My working-class family inspires me every day to stay motivated. I always tell my mom that one day I will take her out of the projects. I always tell myself that I will model black excellence and inspire black girls one day despite the challenges. We may not come from the perfect families, any race applies, and we may create insecurities because I sure did. However, I feel much more determined to succeed and create what ought to be created years ago. That’s positive representation and inspiration for my people. I know there are black families out there perfect, stable, and extremely ideal. That’s true inspiration that