I’ve been having a decent week. I was going to publish this blog yesterday, but like all my other blogs, it’s sitting in my drafts. But this one, will definitely go out today because this day will be a marker for me continue being beautiful.
I know that sounds vague, but to keep things short, LA has been gloomy. Literally, there has been no sunshine and I’ve been trying really hard to connect with more people out here. After my break up last year, I’ve ditched the apps and started going to many events to emerge myself into the real world and make connections the good old fashion ways. Although numbers were exchanged and great conversations were had, they have not been consistent. In fact, maintaining connections out here is like pulling teeth. I live in the city where flakiness is at an all time high, people try to chase the glitz and glamour, and people love getting “the bag”. It’s a facade I’ve been commenting on for a while, and now our LA skies is reflecting is picking up on this dead energy.
As a New Yorker, I don’t drive and I deal with the judgement here A LOT. Fortunately, I have a weapon MONEY! No, I am not rich, I earn decent money (I need to save after this weekend though lol). I Uber a lot on weekends especially and let me tell you, these Uber drivers are amazing. They see different people walking into their car and they have so much personal experience to spill.
I’ve been wanting to blog for a while on Uber drivers and how uplifting they can be. But here I am, finally paying my respects after a very interesting weekend has led me to a lot of thinking. Now, I normally just pop my headphones in and listen to music, but the universe was intentional with having these specific drivers gauge me into a conversation. So onto honoring these Uber drivers.
Roberto
I took this Uber yesterday as I was on my way to see my friend. He gave me a rundown mini history lesson of LA. Instantly, I was engaged. As he was talking, he was telling me to stay away from the hipsters here, and I was living for it. It’s so easy to feel like you aren’t cool enough to be here except I have the opposite problem. I feel wayyyy too cool for LA sometimes where it’s so easy to spot who’s trying to blend in. As a result, I don’t necessarily fit in because the popular people are the most inauthentic souls here.
But Roberto was telling me straight up “Do not go to these places”. Keep your culture and who you are because this city will definitely give you identity problems if you try so hard to fit into a delusional wanna be crowd.
Phyllis
Awww Phyllis! What a pleasure speaking with her! During our chat, I asked her outwardly, “How do you not burn out in a city that doesn’t treasure the bubbly people?” For context, getting ghosted, ignored, and downright looked down upon gets hurtful after a while. When I asked her that question, it was after my friend and I had this long convo on the lack of mannerism in this world, and the constant need to be in the go, neglecting relationships.
Phyllis tells me “do not ever stop being a kind person, no one ever forgets you”. And as simple as those words were, she was absolutely right. She continues to tell me, never stop being who you are and continue having the heart you have. There are people who aren’t for you, but know yourself enough to steer clear.
When I tell you, I had to exchange numbers with this women, I did!
Valerie
Valerie!!!! The LYFT driver on this list. She too was giving me a bit of a history lesson with LA. From gentrification to commenting on the run down areas, because of her I learned that LA had pyramids lol. Anyways, she goes in depth about how the facade people are pushing has really reflected this gloomy weather we have been experiencing. All the surgery, phones, money have been deluding people for the longest.
There’s been no real connection, and unfortunately our distractions with technology have gotten the best of us. I agreed with her 1000% because ever since Covid, you really see so many people lacking social skills. It’s sad to see and her driving to me to that anime/comic event today was the excitement I needed to attend because this weather hasn’t been it.
Elizabeth
And lastly, Elizabeth, my number one catalyst for this blog. After I came from the anime/comic event, I felt gloomy. The turn out was a bit disappointing, some delusional rapper asked me for his number, and the sidewalks were empty ass hell. I’ve done my fair share of supporting community events and really trying to find engaging activities in LA. So, when I spend money going to Uber to these places and I get disappointed at what I see, it reaffirms me that I’ve already been doing more than enough to make my situation better.
I was quiet when I entered the ride. I had my earbuds in ready to go back to Crenshaw dissapointed. But halfway through the ride, I wanted to vent. I tell her, “why has LA been so gloomy?” With that, we started a conversation and she went about how the people here have changed. She would get the worst customers at time who would release their energy onto her, blaming her for why them being late to work, having a bad morning etc. As a result, her 5 star rating on the app would decrease. Elizabeth would have candies, drinks, even shots in her car in order to provide the best service for all her riders.
The next second, I heard weeping. She confesses that she has stage 4 cancer, and when people come into her car complaining about small things all the time, she gets so annoyed. Meanwhile, I can admit my problems seem juvenile compared to what others have to deal with. I even feel bad for complaining at times because I am so blessed. But tbh, this time in a while my heart actually broke. It was such a surreal moment, but I mustered up the words to say something because she most certainly did at that moment.
I told her “you just made an impact in my life today and I needed that beauty”. Of course I continued on, but I was trying my best not to make the cancer the center of the conversation. I can’t say for sure what’s the preferred method of dealing with such but I just wanted to hug her and really let it be known that her words were not only needed to be heard it created an authentic memory for me. And in the words of Phyllis, “people will never forget you”. Meanwhile, in the words of Elizabeth at this moment, she told me as I was exiting my car, “Never stop being beautiful”.
These Drivers Offer People The World
Elizabeth’s ride taught me something else, that we both needed each other at that moment in time. I always say to myself that I want moments, but I want them to be consistent. But this one felt too intentional and divine. As if, God or the universe wanted me to be there at that moment and have this woman say this to me.
Energy is literally a domino effect. If you have great people/situations filled with genuine positive energy, then you will most likely be happier. If you have bad energy, you will most likely be angrier. Whenever I’m angry, even if it’s just over the dumbest shit, I can always trace why I feel such way to something or someone negative. It’s the reason why if I’m angry at the world, it’s because I’m tired of negative things or people existing.
But the same applies to positivity. If I have positive but genuine things, I’m most likely going to be happier. LA has literally been, a wave to say the least. It’s hard to extract genuine healthy people and things here. However, these uber drivers were just that. And although it was just for a moment in time I experienced these conversations, their kindness and wisdom are memories. I wouldn’t be writing this blog if they all did not touch me.
Everyone is always on go trying to gain instant gratification. My awareness has really led me to be disappointed with this current generation and its tendency to glorify easy fixes. We feel less humane every day and I really shake my head at it. But reasons like today remind me that despite all the bullshit in the world, it’s always helpful to lend an ear, speak a little, and be kind because someone may need it that moment.
And no matter how many days I get burnt out, I cannot lose my heart. I don’t want to and technically I shouldn’t because the world really needs it (yess Cali, you need more people like me). I thank god everyday that I am out of entertainment because it really made me lose my soul and my heart. Purpose over pleasure! So here I am, still really hopeful after this weekend that genuine things still exist. My patience is hella thin, but the hope is still there and the heart is still here.
Shout Out To The Uber Drivers
Shout out to all the Uber drivers who have given me the most bomb stories ever. These drivers have given me the most bomb advice because they have seen so much. To be honest, this world would be a lot better if we speak and give each other more love. The support two strangers can give one another in a moment of time is unbelievable. Yesss, I will most likely plug in my earbuds in most upcoming rides, but I write this to say, strike up a convo with your next driver and see what you can learn. I guarantee something beautiful will occur.
There are some dope ass drivers out there and their conversations. Please give them more love and live in the moment. You can benefit from staying off your phone and creating a new beautiful memory in front of you.
